Note to reader: I am writing this dream here in case any part of it become important later and because it was really vivid and I want it saved somewhere.

Also I got my tubes tied in 08 by a Dr because I am in a chair(I have CP, Cerebral Palsy) and I can’t physically take care of myself let alone a kid.

Dear reader in my dream last night I had a little boy, I remember his face vividly even now after I woke up.

He had freckles all over his face and he had blonde hair(mine is dark brown/black and no I don’t dye my hair) that I am pretty sure he got from his dad however I am pretty sure he got my lips.

In the dream I already had him(I think he was about 4-5 months) and his dad no surprise was a Marine(I have a soft spot for them) I know because he was in his cammies and we were on base somewhere(You’re not supposed to wear military clothing off base on a normal day I know because my ex hubby was a Marine).

As the dream starts I was telling this Marine that was holding a car seat, “You’re going to still see him this weekend right?” As we are going into this building.

I got the vibe that he was my baby’s dad but for some reason we weren’t together anymore.

He then tells me that he wants me to meet his new gf with the baby which I was ok with.  I have always said that all I want from a guy if I ever have kids with him is for him to always take care of his kid(be there for them as much as he can and love them) and not try to take them away from me(as in never let me see them because of my chair).

His girlfriend it turns out was really nice and she had me meet her family as well, her dad got a kick out of me(they took us all to breakfast).

After all that the dream goes to me being by myself and he is in his car seat and I put my head down where he can reach it(I don’t want to pick him up because my CP makes my hands shaky and I would drop him) and I start talking to him and telling him how much I love him and how beautiful he is. As I am trying to remember every detail of his face he moves his arm up and touches my nose and smiles.

Dear reader my heart just melted, I knew I was dreaming however I was fighting to stay in the dream with him for as long as I could.

After that the dream goes to my ex hubby and he is getting his daughter ready(little girl he had with his baby momma) for school and I am telling him about my son.

He just kept saying why couldn’t you have waited for me to come back? You know I would have made a great dad to him. I tell him because I can’t trust you and I wake up.