Dear reader I had a dream last night in which my mom’s mother(I don’t consider her my grandmother anymore because of how mean she has been to me for pretty much my entire existence) showed up in my dream towards the end of it trying to talk/yell at me(The part before it was my ex hubby trying to get back with me again but he picked up another girl before we could even try).

I proceeded to ignore her and actively try to wake myself from the dream.

I do have the ability to tell sometimes when I am dreaming and to “assess” the dream from my “awake” point of view.

This is however the first time in which I have actively tried to wake myself up from a dream and not had to stay in the dream for that long after trying to wake up.

I feel personally bad because I wonder if she’s dying or something and is subconsciously trying to get ahold of me.

I don’t want to listen to another one of her lectures on how much of a messed up person I am and how I should somehow magically be walking already(Yes, dear reader she has told me this before, the last time was after my brother’s funeral while still at the cemetery).

Because you know dear reader I have the cure for my CP(Cerebral Palsy) already I just would rather be stuck in a chair….Can you feel the sarcasm from wherever you are dear reader?

I know it’s probably evil not to want to give her absolution, however you can only push a person so far before the only nice thing they can do for you is to pretend you don’t exist.