I really did think I was going to get off here and try to sleep apparently life wants me to post one more thing first so I will. Fair warning some may not/will not like what I am about to say, Please note the following are MY personal thoughts and are not meant to be taken as being about anyone else:

I made the choice to get my tubes tied in 2009(I had a DR. exception regarding my age due to my CP) it was my choice I wasn’t pushed into it, Birth Control wasn’t an option because of blot-clot risk(due to the fact I am either sitting or laying down,I am unable to stand), and bone loss risk, plus I had already at this point in time almost hit my two year depo limit, so it was time to make a long term choice.

I was still with my ex at this point(this was about a year prior to his leaving me) and the Dr. said he should get fix because it would be easier for him to go under then me. I said no, this why my issue and if he ever wanted to leave me and have kids I wanted him to have that choice(Boy if I only knew at the time how true that statement would turn out to be).

I also knew I couldn’t handle caring for a kid being in a chair, I want to be able to run after my kid and pick them up if they had run into the street, and a million other things, Plus I know what its like on a personal level to have a mom who is unable to care for you, before my mom left there were times when she was off her meds and she thought I was a doll and wouldn’t pick me up not matter how much I cried and begged her too. I know its different but I swore to myself that I’d never put my kids though that pain.

I am OK with the choice I made I just wish that I wouldn’t feel like less of a woman sometimes because I’ve chosen to not have kids and I really wish that guys that want to have kids would stop trying to date me.

My last BF(after my ex) broke up with me when he finally stopped trying to change my mind about having kids, when we first started talking I told him that my tubes were tied and I didn’t want kids, he told me it was fine because he had lots of nieces and nephews around(so do I) then he kept telling me how I would be a great mom and we could adopt someday, when he realized I wasn’t changing my mind we broke up. The last guy who tried to get with me already had little kids. I love kids I just can’t care for them. I still believe that I can get married and be a part of a “Family” even with no kids.