Note to reader: The following post is ME venting/dealing with My own personal feelings/emotions in regards to my CP(Cerebral Palsy), My story is my own and I speak for no other other than myself.  I am NOT trying to make anyone feel sorry for me.

Dear reader it’s currently 2AM for me and I feel good(as in good enough to actually want to/be able to do something. Yes, dear reader I took a pain pill, it was either take it or keep dealing with the “Oh, Gods it hurts”.) however the fact that it’s 2AM means that my dad and friends are sleeping.

I am stuck in my bed literally due to the fact that how my CP personally affects me means I can’t walk at all.

My knees are messed up(Knee reconstructive surgery on both Knees anyone? Insurance won’t pay for it unless I could prove that I could physically walk better after having it done which I can’t do unless they gave me the surgery and let me try, it’s complicated).

Plus my body doesn’t always listen to what I want it to do because of the brain injury that caused my CP in the first place.

For all intents and purposes I am stuck in my bed currently and at least for the foreseeable future(until a cure is found..Come on Stem Cell Research I got things to do) stuck in this body.

I know it could be worse trust me. I just wonder what “Normal” “non sick” people do at 2AM do when they can’t sleep and want to do something.

I am a book nerd, but honestly dear reader I can only read for so long at one time before I get board.

I am going to watch episode #1 “State of affairs” on Hulu plus on my PS4 and see if I like it since nothing else is on that I feel like watching.

Thanks for keeping me company dear reader it really does mean a lot to me:).

PS. In case you’re curious dear reader my boyfriend(should I still use that term since he hasn’t talked to me for almost a week?) Hasn’t answer the text message I sent him(last night) about meeting me at the casino on the 17th.

I told him in the message that if I wouldn’t text or call him again after this unless he gets back to me first and that if I don’t hear from him by the 17th I will assume he doesn’t want to be with me anymore(since it would be about 2 weeks by then since we talked at all).