Note to reader: The following post is ONLY about me talking about what I myself am thinking about/feelings right now as I am writing this post. I am NOT trying to say that I am a professional writer because I am not.
Dear reader I am starting to come to terms with/accept the fact that I am a writer meaning I love words and using them to explain/express my feelings.
I am NOT a professional writer yet I don’t know if I ever will be however a goal of mine is to publish a fictional story someday in ebook format(Check out my “Georgia’s Story” tab for some of what I have so far the rest needs to be edited by someone and the person who was helping me out with editing stopped so I have been a bit stuck if you want to see what I have so far it’s there) and I still love writing in this blog and just words in general.
I am feeling this more so right now because I really want to tell Chris(I have been friends with him for about two months or so now pretty much ever since I was on that *dating site* I deactivated my profile on there because of the level of hate and stupid message that I was getting this is also where I *met* Oscar check the “Trials in love” tab of my blog if you’re curious about him he isn’t around me anymore because I didn’t want to deal with random sex if you have been with me on this journey for awhile you will know where I stand on that issue)
Thank you for how much he has been helping me emotionally recently especially with all of the stuff with my divorce papers(the “Endings” tab of my blog has all of my divorce drama in it if you are curious about it) and yes dear reader Chris already knows about my chair, my divorce stuff, and my overall life situation and he doesn’t care.
It’s really funny how we even live really close to each other we haven’t met in person yet but we talk, text, and Skype a lot. He is really cool and I don’t know what to think of him as but as of right now we aren’t dating.
I told him last night that the ball is in his court and if he ever wants to date me he knows how to find me and we will talk about it whenever he feels ready I also told him that I will not wait for him if I find someone else who fits me sooner and me and that person want to try to date I will not turn it down I told him I would let him know if it happens and he said that’s how he wants it because he doesn’t want to stop me from finding someone(it’s the same for him if he finds another girl).
I still really feel close to him though dear reader because we have had a lot of deep long conversations and we just really get each other.
My friends have said that I am a lot calmer now that he is around pretty much he and you guys dear reader are the only people who can handle me right now everyone else either doesn’t get why I am nervous or they are caught up in their own stuff and I just don’t personally have the ability to calm anyone else down at the moment.
He understands my moods and there isn’t any judgement.
Thank you means so much more to me when I really care about someone like I do you guys or my family and friends.
I just want to pour out a whole bunch of words because thank you just doesn’t seem to be enough to cover the way I feel.
Dear reader it’s always the one’s who I don’t expect who get to me the most. If you have been around since Alex then you will pretty much know how I am handling this..
I am thankful for Chris and his friendship and if it turns into more someday then so be it..I have learned the hard way not to fight some things so to speak. I promise to keep you updated on everything that happens.
Thanks again dear reader for staying on this journey with me you are all keeping me sane and I love you all so very much ♡